Master Online Dating

Start Dating Right

send messages that start conversations.

Have conversations that lead to dates.

Have Dates That Lead to Relationships

you just want to meet someone Nice and normal

Maybe you’re putting off getting started with dating.  Or maybe you’ve started, but not getting much results.

You go online and meet people, but some of your matches just don’t talk.

The ones who do talk aren’t right for you.  Or the conversation is stilted and just dies a slow death.

You begin to wonder if there’s something wrong with online dating… or even with you… 

I know how it feels!

After my divorce, I started dating online.  I had no idea how to date online or offline.

When I first started messaging all I got was rejection after rejection. 

I wondered if I was just too ugly  🤷‍♂️

I wondered if online dating would ever work for me!

But after years of trial and error I found a process that meant I could always go onto a dating site and find a suitable partner.

Of course, it takes time to know if they’re the right one, but you can start filling up your Date Card and getting to know them at a deeper level.

Rob McPhillips

Make 2021 The Year You Connect With Someone Special

January 1st, there are going to be thousands of single people flooding onto dating apps.

You can be like everyone else.  Who waste hours chatting aimlessly and end up disappointed.  And decide that Dating Apps don’t work.

Or you can learn how to use them right and build the relationship you want.

With more connection in less time.

There's one key to online dating... messaging

Online dating is like digging for oil. 

You see clues where oil (or a potential partner) is likely to be.  But it’s only after probing you find out.

Messaging – meaning your profile and the actual messages you send are how you probe to know who they are and reveal who you are.

most messages are conversation killers

Boring messages are the dating equivalent of buying a lottery ticket.

They don’t deserve a reply, but you just hope they’ll be impressed with your three line profile and blurry photo. 

Or desperate enough to take your conversational scraps.

You win at online dating by being the one who can spark conversation

Conversations are like fires.  You have to start with some kindling and poke and prod it until it bursts into life.

Then you have to keep feeding the flames.

Online dating is hard, because most people have never learned how to start the conversation fire.

So they have to wait until they meet someone who can start and nurture it for them.

But most people get bored and go off looking for someone more interesting.

you can be that more interesting person

When you know how to send more interesting messages you have more conversations.  

Better conversations leads to more dates.  And better quality dates.

For example, Karen asked me how to get more attention online and so I rewrote her profile to start more conversations.  Following the change, she got more messages and conversations. 

See how the second profile shows people how not to approach her and gives more starting points for conversations…


Original Profile

I am looking for a fun adventurous guy.  I am not looking for anything serious but rather lots of fun, laughter and adventures.  Chemistry is always a plus and will add to the fun.    

K – Kind – I practice kindness with my family, friends, neighbors, wait-staff and the office cleaning staff.

A – Adventurous – I love new adventures.  I like experiencing new places, unique foods, variety in music, local plays and meeting new people.

R – Romantic – I love walks on the beach at sunset, red wine and chocolate in front of a fire, holding hands and candlelight dinners for two.

E – Extroverted – I formulate ideas and solve problems based on interaction and input from others that I trust.

N – Normal – Well, normal is relative and in my world…I am pretty normal.

Things I am proud of:

My 3 grown sons that I raised as a single Mom – They are fantastic, independent, positively contributing men that earned their own success.

My employees – I have the best employees any manager could ask to support.

My friends – I have several friends that span decades of friendship.  We support each other through the challenges and joys of life.

My career – I have worked as a Paper Mill laborer, swim instructor, shoe factory stitcher and IT professional in many business sectors in Maine.

My volunteerism – I have been a Big Sister, a children’s grief facilitator and a friendly visitor to the elderly.

Things I wish I could conquer:

My fear of heights – some hiking trails take a lot of self-encouragement to crest the summit.

My love of sweets – it is hard to have ice cream in the freezer.

My dislike of scary movies – I get tired of throwing the blanket over my head.

Rewritten Profile

Damsel in distress looking for her Prince (White Horse Optional)

The fairy stories told me it would be easier.  That the Prince would ride in and come and sweep me off my feet and we’d ride off for adventures across the kingdom.

It seems that he got lost… or maybe the dragon got him… I’ve put up posters all around town, but someone said I should look on here.  

Unfortunately, all I’ve been getting are pictures of genitals.  I pass them onto the sexual health clinic or post them around town to give people a laugh.

So anyway, I’ve lived a life that’s full… I’ve travelled each and every highway… (I nearly broke into song) but now I’m looking for someone to travel it with.  

I’m looking for the Prince to hold my hand as we stroll along the beach at sunset.  The man who I can relax with a glass of wine and chocolate as we laugh about our day.  The man I can hide behind when the horror movie gets scary.

I’m looking for the man I can show my softer side.  The man worth my love and affection. The man I can support and connect with.  

That is just the one guy and not three separate ones by the way 🙂

I’m looking for someone genuine.  Not the guy that wants to use CIA level encryption in case I get to know his… gasp… phone number.

Nor am I looking for a protracted texting relationship with someone pretending to be someone else… why do people do that?

Oh and… I’m not looking for a father figure.  So if you’re much, much older than me, I’m sure you’re very sweet, but I’m not looking to walk alongside your mobility scooter as we hold hands..

I’m not a great texter… sorry, but I have a busy life and might leave conversations hanging for a few hours.

I would rather look into your eyes as we talk, so I’m looking to have a phone conversation – just to make sure you are a real person – and meet and see if we have a connection sooner rather than later.

I’m waiting for your message, but I’m not looking for a dick pic or the message you copy and paste to 100 girls a night… I’m looking to build a connection… with you.

I know it can be hard to send a cold message, but I’m warm and receptive… so ask me…

about the time I nearly drowned a man…

About my friend that…

About the shoes I made that…

About my time working in a real life Dunder-Miflin

Or about the time I scaled X… and almost had to have counselling from the nerves

Still waiting…

Sending Messages That Start Conversations is the secret to online dating success

We have a full relationship building course, but I wanted to break that up into the smallest bite-sized step that someone could take to get started.

That’s why I created this training programme to help Daters send better messages.

For one month, you will come up with the perfect profile for you.

Not getting success with messaging?

You’ll get a bank full of ides of how to start any message.

Stumped with what to say to a blank profile? 

I’ll show you what to say to spark a conversation that you love to have.

Getting boring messages? 

Here’s how to train people to send you better messages.

Running out of conversation?  Here’s how to create an explosion of new conversations to start.

What you'll really learn is how to develop connection

Connection is how you bring humanity into what can often be toxic playgrounds.

It doesn’t matter what the badly behaved children do, because you’ll learn how to bring the best out in people or leave you alone.

How does this work?

When you join, you’ll start with an onboarding questionnaire.  This helps us clarify your goals.

Then we’ll go into a deep dive on you.  This gives us the awareness and understanding of who you are.

This provides all the sources for what you write in your profile and messages.

Then you’ll be guided through some worksheets that will help you organise all this information you have so that you will always have something to say.

There are five workshops.  These are to give you whatever you need to master messaging.

You can bring your draft versions to the workshops or work on them there and get help refining them.

You get the recordings of all workshops so you can refer back at any time.  

You get the worksheets to redo whenever you need to., if say you find yourself needing to date again.

What does it cost?

I’m not sure whether these series of workshops will be a one-off.  If they do run again, they will probably be £300 – £500.

But for the Founder Class, the cost is £100.

For that you get the process, videos, worksheets and live access to workshops where you can ask questions and get feedback on any messaging you’re stuck with.

Of course the real benefit is that you get the peace of mind of knowing you are dating right.

You get the confidence that you will always know how to date confidently.

This is a live class and so places are limited on a first-come, first-serve basis.

To get started is simple.  Just click the button and book your place now.

a month from now you could be having fun conversations with Interesting people

Always knowing that you can go onto a dating site and send messages that spark conversations. 

And have conversations that lead to dates.

or you can keep pulling your hair out (How do you think i lost mine) wondering if online dating works anymore

Proof that online dating can make you bald!

Dating sites are just the places where single (well mostly) people gather to show they’re interested in a relationship.

Being there is like being in a pub 20 or 30 years and not being able to attract or interest someone you like.

This is the skill for dating success. 

And here’s your best chance to master it!  

Here's the Schedule

Doors open from 27th December to let you get a head start on the rush for all those Daters resolving to find a partner this New Year.

Live Workshops

Wednesday 30th December 2020 – 6 – 8pm

Sunday 3rd January 2021 –   10am – 12pm

Saturday 9th January 2021 – 2pm – 4pm

Wednesday 13th January 2021 – 6pm – 8pm  

Wednesday 20th January 2021 – 6pm – 8pm       

All live sessions will be recorded and available to all members.

The workshops are for action.  The fanciest profile is useless if it’s not up and getting seen.

If you aren’t messaging people, you’re not having conversations.  Without conversations, nothing happens.

So we’ll be there.  You can ask questions as we set up your profiles or send messages to potential dates.

Stuck on what to say or how to reply?

Ask and we’ll help you craft your reply there and then.

What You'll Get

A step by step process

You can't go wrong because you'll always know what to do next.


Just follow the exercises and you'll always know what to say and when.


Most people don't act because they are unsure or unconfident. You'll get plenty of time to ask questions, refine your profile and messages. And generally make sure you know what you are doing.

What happens in the workshops?

A process to make sure you are making the most of your dating opportunities.

Videos and worksheets to help you step by step.

Workshops to ask questions and get your work reviewed.

Support and encouragement to build your profile, send messages that build conversations and get dates with the right people.

Not Ready yet, but want to learn more?

The journey to mastery begins when you realise what you don’t know, that you don’t know.

Here’s what you’re missing…